Dear Readers, A little more than a year ago, when my youngest son was looking for an apartment to rent in Vermont, I closed my computer and prayed a desperate prayer: “Lord, I’ve done all I know how to do. I need you to show us the place you have for him.” Our son was…
I sit at the round, steel table in the church café. I don’t much like the décor. It’s trying too hard to be modern, to be relevant, like so many sacred places do these days. You notice me, unlike most passers-by. At fifty you begin to fade, you’ll find, become invisible. You are curious, a…
I believe in prayer. I say often that “the work of God is done on our knees—then we go find out what happened.” Yet to me prayer remains such a mystery. How in the world could the most high God who created it all invite me to talk with him, to make requests, to ask…
What unrelenting, surprising, or confusing situation in your life has caused you to question God? Perhaps your body is betraying you, and you and your doctors have done everything possible. You’ve prayed, cried, confessed, and bargained. Still, you suffer. Is God even listening? you wonder. Maybe you believe God has called you to minister, but…
I’m the daughter of a praying mother, a woman who always keeps a prayer list by her bedside. As a child, I often snuck into her room to see what she was praying for me. “Attitude change? Patience?” I would read, bristling, not at the suggestion that I had a bad attitude, but that she…
I’ve become that person who gently encourages others to overcome their fear of praying out loud.
As Christians, we know we’re to pray without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:16), to pray for the Lord’s people (Ephesians 6:18), and to humble ourselves and pray to God (2 Chronicles 7:14). Of course, while it’s natural for prayers to ebb and flow over time as we go through different seasons of our life, there is…
Dear Reader, Recently I listened to an episode of one of my favorite podcasts, The Next Right Thing, with Emily P. Freeman. Emily interviewed Amanda Held Opelt, the sister of well known speaker Rachel Held Evans. Amanda lost her sister suddenly in May of 2019. On the podcast, Amanda talks about her book A Hole…
Each week, they would cram into a tight circle in my small apartment for Bible study. I’d been given the privilege of mentoring them, these young people who carried the weight of more trauma than their young bones should be asked to bear. As we gathered, we’d discuss Scripture, share stories and dreams, process life,…
If I close my eyes and think back to the scene in her bedroom, I can still hear her gasping for breath. I can still see my mom’s eyes close as she falls asleep mid-conversation. I wince when I think about her bedsores, and I can’t help but well up with tears when I picture…
Although I find it hard to do myself, I think that lament is one of the core things that is important for a believer to acknowledge and give space for. Like repentance and confession, lament is a natural response to being in God’s presence, being in God’s word, knowing God’s heart, and hearing God’s voice….
I recently had a birthday. The second birthday I’ve “celebrated” without my husband. That’s how I track time now. Before he died. After he died. That’s not grief or mourning. It’s just the way it is. Keeping track of time by his death comes as naturally to me as breathing. Many don’t get it, but…
The poem “Mourners” by Ted Kooser,1 about folks meeting at a funeral, ends with the following lines: They came this afternoon to say goodbye, but now they keep saying hello and hello, peering into each other’s faces, slow to let go of each other’s hands. In this poem, we see the longing of the mourners to…
I’ve always been a crier—the one who teared up at a sappy movie or tearjerker book ending, at sweet moments and frustrating disappointments. But I never knew a body could cry so many tears until my husband died suddenly. There had been no notice, no sign that anything was wrong with him. On a normal…